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Friday, January 18, 2008

News Getting Bizarre in Texas (Don't Lose Your Head Over This)

Photo: Blame it on the (Full) Moon over Houston

The local news in Texas is getting so bizarre where does one begin?

The Houston DA, Chuck Rosenthal, who has a fondness for racist and sexist jokes and whose staff rejects jurors from Joel Osteen’s Lakewood Church as if they were Scientologists, now is rejecting the Grand Jury indictment of a Texas Supreme Court judge and his wife on arson-related charges. And it turns out that the Grand Jury is mainly Republicans from the DA’s party. How strange is that? A runaway Grand Jury?

Then it is revealed that a candidate for Congress had an ad featuring his head and someone else’s (thinner) body. Missing on his list of accomplishments was “3rd Place Winner of Weight Watchers Award.” Since he is running for Tom DeLay’s old seat in CD22, I’m sure we can look forward to the highest form of ethics and honest new photos of the candidate’s head on top of Laura Bush’s body and other amazing achievements.

All this comes on the heels of revelations that the Texas Attorney General did his best to deny returning veterans out of their benefits while doing a legal review of Texas law that failed to include consideration of the U.S. Constitution.

And –keep counting--the County Sheriff, panicked by the Rosenthal email scandal, and aware that some of Chuck’s "funny" jokes might be on his computers, wiped out their system’s emails over the weekend. Preemptive war is now replaced by preemptive deletion of evidence.

The moral of this story is that you can avoid indictment in Houston for burning your house (or worse) as long as your job is a “biggie” like sitting on the Supreme Court and you are member of the same party as the DA. Otherwise, you’ll get the death penalty for being politically unconnected and tossed off the jury panel for going to the wrong church (e.g. Lakewood), or whatever they come with next.

Imagine the image this gives Houston and Texas to the outside world? How is this going to draw businesses and conventions to our area?

Our new slogan could become: “What Happens Here, Stays Here, Because We Delete it From the Computers!”

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